An unarmed, 34 year old dental hygienist by the name of Miriam Carey, from Stamford Connecticut, was murdered earlier today near the home of reputed mob boss Barack Obama. Dozens of bullets tore through her black two-door Infiniti, as she traveled with her toddler. Her body was so badly torn apart by the gunfire, that…...
Update 4:25pm EST. This has been called off. As the clock loudly ticks towards midnight, the hour is expected to bring with it a partial shutdown of the United States Federal Government. Will the people of New York grow tails and begin attacking one another? Or will they simply go about their daily lives with…...