Radical Agenda S06E025 - Outer with Crowder
Radical Agenda

Radical Agenda S06E025 – Outer with Crowder

Written by SurrealPolitiks
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Another day, another celebrity sex scandal. Turns out Steven Crowder’s least controversial move was telling his pregnant wife “I’ll fuck you up”. At least that was heterosexual, and whatever merit  there may be to the criticism of his treatment of women, I am not of the opinion that this video told us much or put his wife in the best light.

The latest news is, Mr. Crowder has been sending dick pics to male employees and whipping it out around the office, in between drug deals. This according to “five former show staffers and one source close to Crowder” who spoke anonymously to Mediaite, sharing text messages and photographs as proof. They said these incidents became so frequent that “I don’t want to say it became ‘normal’ but it became less of a big deal.” and “It happened all the time. It was a regular occurrence. It usually happened when he was in a really good, sort of manic mood.”

I’ve got all the sympathy in the world for my fellow public figures. I am not complaining to note that this can be a stressful job. Fame can go to a man’s head even when one is at as low a level as I, and the evils which must tempt a man in Crowder’s position I imagine are all the more vicious. People telling you how great you are, which in my experience invariably coincides with you disagreeing with that person. Other people tell you that you suck. You tell them they are jealous losers, which is obviously true, but deep down you kinda think they’re right. It can be a lot to deal with. The job and the persona can completely consume your life, and it’s easy to understand a man seeking validation through other means.

Sex is very effective in this. It’s got a similar quality to fighting in that sense. Just me and my body. No status. No money. No traffic statistics or Twitter followers or algorithms to credit with your success. No censors to blame if you fail.

When you fight a man, or you fuck a woman, that’s the moment of truth right there. Are you, flesh and bone man, up to the task? Or are you a fiction of others’ perceptions? You’re about to find out.

And so is she.

There are some embarrassing images of me out there, but no dick pics. Whatever anyone tells you, they just plain do not exist. I do not send dick pics to women I am actively fucking, and whom I have every reason to believe enjoy every aspect of this wonderful gift. I cannot imagine firing these things off all willy nilly to anyone, much less men.

Perhaps I am fortunate that I have no reason to expect anyone to react positively to a photograph of my penis. I must figure any man in this habit is better endowed, because this is the last thing I expect would earn me anyone’s respect, much less a man’s. Even if I was rocking a full on kickstand, I don’t think the sort of men I seek the respect of would react well to that sort of thing. I put a great deal of effort trying to impress women with everything but my genitals in the hopes that perhaps I’ll be able to impress her with how the thing works more than how it looks. Even when it comes time for show and tell, I consider myself very fortunate that have a good telling game, because I do not expect to get anywhere with the visual element.

But then again, I’m not into men. Not sexually, anyway. Women have sent me revealing photos of themselves more than a few times over the years, and I do find these very exciting under the right circumstances. Men, I understand to be more visual than women. If you’re a faggot, a cock pic might well make your day.

But I still have trouble understanding why somebody would take the risk of sending one to somebody they didn’t expect to react positively. Self deprecating humor aside, in 43 years no woman has ever laughed at or spoken ill of my endowment, and yet I still have this absurd paranoia that she will just burst out laughing when I take my pants off and be like “No, haha, it’s not you, I was just, ah, I was thinking of something else hehe. It’s a good size, really, it’s fine. What time is it anyway?”.

According to the Mediaite story, Crowder was doing this on a routine basis to people who expressed disgust and fear. Is this some kind of faggot domination ritual I am unfamiliar with?

And what’s with conservative personalities doing this stuff?

I was totally unsurprised at the Anthony Weiner bit. Not only is his name literally Weiner, but he’s a Democrat, so you expect him to be a filthy fucking degenerate. The most surprising part of his story is that the underage girl he was tweeting dick pics to, happened to actually be a girl, and one who had already gone through puberty at that. This is one of the tamer tales from the land of Democrat depravity, come to think about it. His fellow Democrats probably mocked him more for his technical incompetence than his sex crime.

But I actually believed Weiner’s technical snafu, once we got over the hacked account lie. He looks like the kinda Jewish pervert who could be so excited by the prospect of committing a sex crime that he’d mix up the functions of Twitter.

Other Jewish Democrats, not so much. Jeffrey Tube Out, formerly known as Jeffrey Tubin, famously whipped it out during a Zoom call “by accident”. If you buy that, I got a vaccine to sell ya. A hot mic is one thing, folks. That I get. A camera aimed directly at your erect penis is an entirely different category of “mistake”. I’m afraid to scratch my nose on camera for fear people will think I’m picking it. When I finish the show, I don’t just stop recording, I make sure the camera application is closed, and the light on the camera is off, before I do so much as adjust myself. This guy lowers the camera, and starts masturbating, then says “whoops!” as if this would somehow have been a non-issue had he not been caught. Like, what is it about you Jewish degenerates that you have to masturbate on the break anyway?

But you expect that from these people. They are the party of “Minor Attracted Persons” and “Trans Youth” after all.

We expect better from conservatives, though less by the day…

Eric Bolling famously parted ways with Fox News after he was caught sending dick pics to female coworkers. Roger Ailes and Bill O’Reilly were both ousted from Fox News over unspecific sexual harassment allegations. That’s how we got Tucker Carlson, who parted ways under substantially more reputable terms for him, and substantially more sinister terms for the network.

But at least all these incidents involved adult women…

Maybe Crowder was just learning a lesson from the Fox guys. Maybe he isn’t gay. Maybe he was just like “Oh, I know what happens if I show my dick to the girls, I better just show it to guys”.

Seems an odd lesson to take away from that, but when you make as much money as Crowder I suppose it’s easy for your perceptions to get kinda warped. The guy turned down $50 million from the Daily Wire, calling it “Slavery”. Then he signed with Rumble. I imagine Dan Bongino regrets this more than his departure from Fox, right about now…

Which raises kind of an interesting question about the wife bit. I mentioned at the beginning that there was this incident where a ring camera video got published in the New York Post, and in it Crowder is arguing with his then pregnant wife about “the car”. She wanted to take “the car” and he asked her when she would be back and she was like “I’ll be back when I’ll be back” and he, understandably, was like “No, fuck you!”.

And if I had a pregnant wife, and I was like “When will you be back” and she said that to me, I’d be like “you’re not going goddamn anywhere, you’re carrying my child and I provide for and protect you and you don’t get to tell me ‘I’ll be back when I get back’ absolutely not”. So people were passing this around, and because he said “I’ll fuck you up” they were saying he abused her. I thought the thing was taken out of context and didn’t really prove this.

But if Crowder is turning down $50 million from Ben Shapiro, I have my doubts he is doing this out of sheer principle. He’s not like “Fuck these Jews, I’m Steven make the Kikes scream louder Crowder, and I don’t take your shekels you fucking kikes”. Like, he obviously had enough money for more than one car, if he’s turning down $50 million shekels.

So how are they arguing about “the car” when this guy obviously can afford a fleet? Like, when she says “I need the car” he should probably be like “which one?” unless he’s spending all those shekels on rentboys or whatever, in which case, like, “Yeah whatever, stay out all night. Stupid pregnant bitch should have just let me put it in your ass like the guys at work”.

I couldn’t find out how much Rumble is paying him, but I bet it’s less than $50 million. He hasn’t posted a video in 9 days, in recent weeks, most of his videos do less than half a million views.

And just so you know, like, Rumble’s traffic stats are fake. I went over this in the Telegram group. Which, by the way, you should join. If you’re not on Telegram, get on Telegram, it’s like the only thing I’ve never been banned from. The public channel is https://t.me/followchris and that will get you to the comments group which is https://t.me/cantwellcomments.

Going over the numbers in detail wouldn’t make very good radio, but suffice it to say, I know that Rumble’s numbers for SurrealPolitiks are fake, because I’ve been doing this for years and I understand how the views to engagement numbers work. For one, my videos on Rumble are monetized and less than 1% of the video views are actually serving ads. On top of this, Rumble says SurrealPolitiks is doing more views on Rumble than Radical Agenda is on Odysee, and there’s not a likes/comments to views ratio that makes this plausible. I’ve never heard somebody say “Hey Chris, I discovered you on Rumble” and while I don’t rule out the possibility that some people have, this would definitely have happened by now if SurrealPolitiks was more popular on Rumble than Radical Agenda is on Odysee. So, when people tell you they are doing all these numbers on Rumble, cut that in half and you’ll still be overestimating. The numbers are totally fake.

And despite this, his premier broadcast on Rumble did 90,000 viewers. More than I do, for sure, but it’s pretty bad if you’re Steven Crowder.

He keeps this up the next time he shows his dick to a guy might be on the casting couch.

I was talking with Pat before the show about this, and as some of you might knowif you recognize his calls by name, me and Pat have interesting conversations about what some describe as capitalism. I also, on the most recent SurrealPolitiks Member Chat, which was great by the way, and you should really sign up at https://SurrealPolitiks.com/join with code agenda33 at checkout for 33% off your first 3 months, but I was talking about the subject of success and some of the literature on that, and the thrust of my point was that you are responsible for your success or your failure and it doesn’t do you any good to blame external factors. Whatever it is that you want, you have to navigate those external factors, and if you fail to do that, it is fundamentally your own fault, however disreputable you may think those external factors may be.

And Pat paid me a very nice compliment. He said that I should be more successful than Steven Crowder. And that’s probably true. But I went into sort of libertarian autist mode and was like “Hey man, he navigated the market better than I did, so he gets to turn down Ben Shapiro’s money. Ben Shapiro doesn’t offer me money, so I have no opportunity to turn it down. If I want to turn down Ben Shapiro’s money, then I’m going to have to do something that Ben Shapiro wants to pay me $50 million for, and that’s probably going to involve showing a lot of guys my dick. And as we’ve established, I don’t even send dick pics to girls, so I’m stuck begging for shekels here, and at ChristopherCantwell.net.donate.

That’s not an exact quote, and I imagine Pat is laughing at his radio right now, because it’s a pretty dramatic mischaracterization of what happened, but a guy gotta tell a joke once in awhile.

More to the point, I posted the other day this segment from Atlas Shrugged. Near every well read libertarian has Atlas Shrugged under his belt. Now, there is obviously plenty to criticize about libertarianism, and all the more to criticize about Ayn Rand personally, and plenty more still to criticize about Atlas Shrugged as a book.

But those of us who came from the libertarian space all know of Francisco d’Anconia’s speech about the root of money. Those of you who have not had the opportunity to know of this great work, I invite you to consider it. You may find things in this to criticize as well, but you would certainly better your perspective if you read it, twice, and gave it some serious thought, before you did.

It begins when Mr. d’Anconia, a wealthy man who has begun inexplicably destroying his own inherited fortune, hears a woman say “Money is the root of all evil.”

He responds with a rhetorical question “Have you ever asked what is the root of money?”

Which he then goes on to answer at some considerable length, but I will quote one of my favorite passages here to lure you in;

“Money will not purchase happiness for the man who has no concept of what he wants; money will not give him a code of values, if he’s evaded the knowledge of what to value, and it will not provide him with a purpose, if he’s evaded the choice of what to seek. Money will not buy intelligence for the fool, or admiration for the coward, or respect for the incompetent. The man who attempts to purchase the brains of his superiors to serve him, with his money replacing his judgment, ends up by becoming the victim of his inferiors. The men of intelligence desert him, but the cheats and the frauds come flocking to him, drawn by a law which he has not discovered: that no man may be smaller than his money. Is this the reason why you call it evil?”

I love that whole speech, but that line in particular. Money is not an end. It is not even a means, properly understood. It is a representation of something distinct from the money itself. It is a representation of value.

And so, if the market values Steven Crowder more than me, you know, the market is, well…

Okay, fuckit, Nazi time…

217-688-1433 if you would like to be on pogrom and the more you talk the less I have to, so please do give us a call. And while you’re loading up those phone lines I’m going to play a clip real quick. I’ll be right  back, enjoy this classic Radical Agenda bit…

 

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